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DCI to Switch to Shembeteng on Twitter Threads to Curb Violent Crime


(Tunawa Lombotove)

Amid an increase in violent crimes in Nairobi, the DCI has vowed to tackle the matter seriously.

“The problem is that these criminals cannot read stories of our heroic triumphs in the criminal world on Twitter. If they did, they would be shaking in their boots. English is not their tongue.” A senior officer told the press.

When asked when they would go to the ground to investigate the crimes, an officer replied, “Awareness is everything. I don’t think these criminals know how good we are at our job. We’ll save time and reduce crime at once.”

The DCI has invested heavily in teaching their Digital Team Shembeteng to ensure their message reaches the target audience.

“We have sourced for the best Shembeteng teachers in the country as part of our commitment to quality.” Said the DCI boss.

Reporting for work on Monday will be the famous Jembeteshi Jimbitinga after Madocho failed the interview.

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