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Kibe Whips Jesus for Crying


(Where are your whips?)

After videos showing that Jesus wept surfaced on the internet, the whole nation waited patiently for The Andrew Kibe Show the same night. People wanted to see what the Manosphere guru would say about the Son of Man. Viewers were not disappointed.

“And then there’s Jesus. What a puny. Lemme look for the video.” Kibe told the ten thousand viewers on his live show.

“Let’s talk about this kapuny juu naona ameanza kuwa kama kabahanye mtoto wa Diana.” He continued.

“This guy is among the greatest we have around. He can stay 40 days and nights without food. Ata maji ana change inakua pombe but just like the puny that he is, kazi yake ni kulia lia in public. WHERE ARE YOUR WHIPS!”

“And I know why he is behaving like a puny”, Kibe said. “It is because women dominate his life. Amekuwa ka Liam.”

“This guy at 30 years anafuatana na mamake kwenda harusi. Juzi pia mliona aki oshwa miguu na Martha. Yaani, those 12 men always surrounding him cannot tell him to stop being puny?”

Kibe has since petitioned Pontious Pilate for the job of Chief Whipist after reports surfaced that Jesus may soon be arrested.

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