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Safaricom Rebrands to offering Mama Mboga Services


“Nyanya ni tatu mbao” Peter Ndegwa told reporters.

In a shock move, Safaricom has left the telecommunications industry and ventured into the mama mboga sector. This comes amid reports that the next government could break up the company to reduce its monopoly over the industry.

Speaking to reporters while cutting Sukumawiki for a customer, CEO Peter Ndegwa denied the rumor.

Clad in a yellow and green apron written kazi ni kazi, he stated that Safaricom left the industry after failing to keep their customers’ money safe.

“Too many people were being scammed, and we could do nothing about it. I mean, all our tech guys were poached by Google and Microsoft.”

However, one week after the company rebranded, there have been reports of vegetable shortages while prices have surged.

Turns out Safaricom has bought 65.4% of the market’s produce and is reselling at higher prices.

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